Is illegal immigrant synonym of undocumented?

Apparently, 'inmigrantes indocumentados' (undocumented) means 'illegal immigrants' to Google translate. This must definitely be an epic failed from Google.

Take a look at it by yourself at http://abcnews.go.com/ABC_Univision/ABC_Univision/google-translate-finally-undocumented/story?id=19950599

For perfect translation visit us at www.lingperfect.com!

English to Chinese? This is how you do it!

English to Chinese

1) THAT'S NOT RIGHT ......................... SUM TING WONG

2) ARE YOU HARBORING A FUGITIVE?............. HU YU HAI DING

3) SEE ME ASAP................................ KUM HIA NAO

4) STUPID MAN ............................... DUM FUK

5) SMALL HORSE .............................. TAI NI PO NI

6) DID YOU GO TO THE BEACH? ................. WAI YU SO TAN

7) I BUMPED INTO A COFFEE TABLE ............. AI BANG MAI FA KIN NI

8) I THINK YOU NEED A FACE LIFT .............CHIN TU FAT

9) IT'S VERY DARK IN HERE ................... WAO SO DIM

10) I THOUGHT YOU WERE ON A DIET ............. WAI YU MUN CHING?

11) THIS IS A TOW AWAY ZONE .................. NO PAH KING

12) OUR MEETING IS SCHEDULED FOR NEXT WEEK ... WAI YU KUM NAO?

13) STAYING OUT OF SIGHT ..................... LEI YING LO

14) HE'S CLEANING HIS AUTOMOBILE ............ WA SHING KA

15) YOUR BODY ODOR IS OFFENSIVE ............. YU STIN KI PU

16) GREAT .................................... FA KIN SU PAH

This may be funny but definitely not accurate! For accurate translations go visit us at www.lingperfect.com

Fluc, Japanese or American English?

Language Barriers

An Asian man walked into the currency exchange in New York with 2000 Japanese yen and walked out with $72.

The following week, he walked in with 2000 yen, and was handed $66. He asked the teller why he got less money than the previous week.

The teller said, "Fluctuations."

The Asian man stormed out, and just before slamming the door, turned around and shouted, "Fluc you Amelicans, too!"

Joke from: http://www.jokes.com/funny-nationality-jokes/ntstbj/language-barriers

Don't get fluc-ed and get good translation services with us! For more info go to www.lingperfect.com

What's a Poo service?

They are number 2! They may also be able to wipe your hard drive!

We are for sure neither number 1 nor 2 of this kind because we are ISO certified! We provide you with the best translation quality! Go to www.lingperfect.com for information on our services!

Ten translated slogans gone wrong

Lost in translation... mistakes certain businesses would rather forget

1) The Pepsi slogan, “Come alive with the Pepsi Generation” translated in Taiwanese became, “Pepsi will bring your ancestors back from the dead”. Not only a bit creepy by culturally, it was an insult.

2) In China, the Kentucky Fried Chicken slogan “finger-lickin' good” became “eat your fingers off”. Again, implying an action considered rude and uncivilised in Chinese culture.

3) Beer manufacturer Coors tried to translate its slogan, “Turn it loose”, into Spanish. It went horribly wrong when it was read as “Suffer from diarrhoea”.

4) Perdue's slogan, “it takes a strong man to make a tender chicken”, translated in Spanish to, “It takes an aroused man to make a chicken affectionate”.

5) To advertise their leather seats, American Airlines used the slogan, “Fly in Leather”, which translated in Spanish for the market in Mexico as, “Fly naked”.

6) In China, the Coca-Cola name was first read as “ke-kou-ke-la”, meaning “Bite the wax tadpole”, or “Female horse stuffed with wax”, depending on the dialect.

7) When General Motors introduced the Chevy Nova in South America, the company was unaware that “No Va” meant “It won't go”.

8) Ford had a similar problem in Brazil when the Pinto flopped. The company found that Pinto was Brazilian slang for “Tiny male genitals”.

9) In Italy, a campaign for Schweppes Tonic Water translated into “Schweppes Toilet Water”.

10) Japan's second-largest tourist agency was mystified when it entered English-speaking markets and kept receiving sex tour requests. Upon finding out why, the owners of Kinki Nippon Tourist Company quickly changed its name.

http://realbusiness.co.uk/article/22643-ten-translated-slogans-gone-wrong

Don't risk the image of your precious business and get your slogan translated with us! With our ISO certifications you are guaranteed with the highest translation quality! Visit us at www.lingperfect.com for more information about our services!

How did they cooked these dishes?

Laugh out loud (LOL) because tomorrow is Friday (TGIF)! We are sure this picture is going to help you LOL!

For perfect translation and not this kind of translations visit us at www.lingperfect.com!

Is this true? EU English?

Europe English

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the EU rather than German which was the other possibility.

As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a five year phase-in plan that would be known as "Euro-English".

In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of the "k". This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have 1 less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like "fotograf" 20% shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be ekspekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkorage the removal of double letters, which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of the silent "e"s in the language is disgraseful, and they should go away.

By the fourth year, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v". During ze fifz year, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and similar changes vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters.

After zis fifz yer, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi to understand ech ozer. Ze drem vil finali kum tru! And zen world!


This is obviously not true! We just want to make you laugh a little because it is only Wednesday! However, if this English becomes official in the EU we will make sure we get your translation across! For now visit us at www.lingperfect.com for a long list of languages we currently provide!

How easy is it to translate a joke?

---

October 19, 2012

Me Translate Funny One Day

By JASCHA HOFFMAN

Last year, an Australian news anchor who was interviewing the Dalai Lama with the aid of an interpreter opened the exchange with a joke: “The Dalai Lama walks into a pizza shop and says, ‘Can you make me one with everything?’ ” His Holiness’s baffled stare, viewed by nearly two million people on YouTube, presents a lesson in the risks of translating humor.

But among the polyglots who convened this month in Rochester for the annual meeting of the American Literary Translators Association — where the topic was “The Translation of Humor, or, the Humor of Translation” — there is a sense of cautious optimism. At least some measure of levity, these dedicated professionals believe, must be able to migrate between languages. The French, after all, seem to appreciate Woody Allen.

“It takes a bit of creativity and a bit of luck,” said David Bellos, a professor of French and comparative literature at Princeton, who, as he prepared his keynote speech for this year’s conference, confessed to finding a disconcerting shortage of jokes beginning: “A pair of translators walk into a bar.”

“The received wisdom that you can never translate a joke is worth examining a bit more closely,” Bellos told me. The trick to translating humor, Bellos argues in his book, “Is That a Fish in Your Ear?: Translation and the Meaning of Everything,” is to abandon the idea of perfect fidelity and instead try to find a joke that rings some of the same bells as the original. By this standard, many simple punch lines, from the morbid to the absurd, are not that much harder to translate than the weather.

When complications do arise, they are usually caused by one of two tricky areas: cultural references and wordplay, according to those seasoned in the art. Culture-bound humor often presents a dilemma: you can either lose readers with a cryptic allusion or you can burden the text with explanatory footnotes. In an increasingly English-speaking world, the best solution is sometimes to let it stand. To take one recent example, the Danish edition of Gary Shteyngart’s “Super Sad True Love Story,” a satirical novel set in near-future New York, leaves untouched such chat acronyms as timatov (“think I’m about to openly vomit”) and roflaarp (“rolling on floor looking at addictive rodent pornography”).

“Nothing is worse than killing the joke by over-­explaining,” said Shteyngart, who has patiently replied to requests for clarification of terms like “Negra Modelo” and “stomach stapling” from scrupulous interpreters, particularly the Scandinavian ones.

Puns can be especially treacherous. To translate Hervé Le Tellier’s “Quelques Mousquetaires,” a surreal French story about a man plagued by self-incrementing numbers, Daniel Levin Becker, the youngest member of the French literary society known as Oulipo, had to dig deep. Corruptions of famous titles like “The Postman Always Rings Thrice” and “The Four Musketeers” were easy to render faithfully; numerical puns like quatorze intéressant (the whimsical sum of très intéressant + 1) required a little more sweat. Devising an entirely new set of English puns was “the only way to stay afloat as the narrator sinks ever deeper into his numberplay,” Levin Becker writes in the preface to his translation, “and the only way to retain the spirit of learned absurdity that makes the story infectious.”

But outright jokes are not the holy grail of comedy, as any stand-up comedian will tell you. It is harder to recreate the seductive humorous tone of a Dickens or a Twain — or for that matter, a Cosby or a Pryor — than it is to render a one-liner into Mandarin. To really make people snort milk out their noses, you need to earn their trust with a convincing persona that summons an atmosphere of ambient hilarity.

For the foreign translators of David Sedaris, the elusiveness of comedic tone is no laughing matter. Sergio Flaksman, who brought “Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim” into Brazilian Portuguese, found that in early drafts, Sedaris came off as a whiny, melodramatic wreck. After listening to the nasal deadpan of Sedaris’s radio broadcasts, Flaksman was able to contrive a kind of Brazilian surrogate whose “relentless mean humor could show its smiling fangs” in Portuguese.

Might some funny bits actually get funnier in translation? In the title story of George Saunders’s “Pastoralia,” a character is paid to impersonate a cave man at a theme park, his employers providing a freshly-killed goat to roast daily, until one morning he goes to the usual spot and finds it “goatless.” Among the many possible renderings of this made-up word, Saunders’s German translator chose ziegenleer, a lofty-sounding melding of “goat” and “void” with no exact equivalent in English.

“The German translation is accurate, but the word combination tickles some kind of orthographical, sound-receptive funny bone,” explained the Latvian translator Kaija Straumanis, the editorial director for Open Letter Books, the University of Rochester’s literature in translation press and one of the conference organizers. “The more high-minded you make it sound in your head, the funnier it gets, implying a rusted-out box into which this man is staring and seeing a severe and disconcerting lack of goat.”

Deliberately skewed translation can also lead to a kind of mischievous comedy. The game of making one language sound like another has been a verbal pastime at least since Renaissance poets managed to concoct lines that made sense in both Hebrew and Italian. The midcentury Hollywood actor Luis van Rooten revived the practice by phonetically transcribing nursery rhymes into brilliantly nonsensical French. (His “Humpty Dumpty” begins “Un petit, d’un petit” — if you’re perplexed, read the French aloud slowly.) Bilingual high jinks continue with the current YouTube craze for misheard lyrics, including a remarkably convincing misconstrual of “Carmina Burana,” whose dire invocation, “O Fortuna,” becomes the only slightly less solemn exhortation “Gopher Tuna!”

In the real world, of course, translators have a certain kind of shadowy power. Jimmy Carter learned this the hard way in Poland when his nonnative interpreter turned a perfectly wholesome remark of his into “I desire the Poles carnally.” And shortly after he left office, Carter was perplexed to find his opening anecdote in a speech to a college in Japan greeted with uproarious laughter. When he asked why the joke had gotten such an extraordinary response, he received this reply from his Japanese interpreter: “I told the audience, ‘President Carter told a funny story; everyone must laugh.’ ”

But all kidding aside, what makes a good translator of humor?

“We talk about the cerebral difficulties, but at some point you have to become an artist, and just work with what you can find,” said Roger Sedarat, an associate professor of English at Queens College who has translated the 14th-century Persian poet Hafez and the modern Iranian poet Nader Naderpour, and moderated a panel at this year’s convention on rendering the lighter side of Persian verse.

As with serious prose, it’s no coincidence that the best translators are among the most enthusiastic readers. “I feel that when the translator is laughing, the humor will manage to get across,” the Greek translator Myrsini Gana said, adding: “One of the biggest difficulties when translating David Sedaris’s humor is that you laugh so hard that it is almost impossible to concentrate.”

No matter how resourceful the translator, though, there are limits to what can be faithfully done to elicit a laugh. “You try to save as much as possible without driving yourself crazy,” said Ingo Herzke, who has rendered Shteyngart into German. But, he admitted, “More often than not you have to let a joke go.”

Jascha Hoffman has written for Nature and The New York Times.

Translation is not a easy job but still do it magnificently and our ISO certification proves it! We do all kind of translation you can imagine, just go to www.lingperfect.com to learn more about our services!

How do we imitate animal sounds in different languages?

Animal	English	French	German	Spanish	Dutch
cock	cock-a-doodle- doo	coquerico	kikeriki	kikiriki	kukeleku
dog	bow-wow	ouap-ouap	waf-waf	guav-guav	woef-woef
cat	me-aow	mi-aou	mi-auw	mi-au	mi-jauw
cow	moo	meuh	mmuuh	muuu	moe
duck	quack quack	coin coin	quack quack	cua cua	kwak kwak
frog	croak/ribbit	croa croa	quaak quaak	croac croac	kwak kwak

Not only words  but also sounds can be translated! Being ISO certified we do it all with the highest quality! Want to know more about the services we offer? Go check us out at www.lingperfect.com

Do you understand his English?

It's only Tuesday! There is a lot left from this week! So, it's time to laugh a little and be positive!

Hahahahaha...I hope this video helps you make it through the day! And if you need some subtitling more complicated than this video, with that I mean in another language, we are here to help!

Don't forget we are ISO certified! Therefore, you know for sure that your intended audience will definitely understand you!

Click on this link to see some of our subtitling work: http://lingperfecttrans.blogspot.com/2013/06/some-of-our-subtitling-work-for-more.html

For more information, visit us at www.lingperfect.com

Do you speak English? Sprechen Sie Deutsch?

Hello everyone!

Here is a funny video for you to laugh a little on this dull Thursday weather!

Maybe these guys can't help. But we definitely CAN! Plus, we are no joke! We are ISO certified! Visit us at www.lingperfect.com for more information!

How much would you rely on this new phone app as a translator?

This instant visual translation app is said to be two times faster and more accurate than Google Translate. Google is 0 (zero) accurate. That times 2? How accurate do you think could be?

http://venturebeat.com/2013/07/15/waygo-tears-down-language-barriers-with-instant-visual-translation-app-exclusive/

Want something guaranteed to be very accurate? Go to www.lingperfect.com

Have you tried Youtube caption translation tool yet?

Here are some proofs this tool cannot be trusted! http://newmediarockstars.com/2013/05/youtubes-5-worst-hilariously-catastrophic-auto-caption-fails/

Unlike Youtube caption translator, we do provide the highest quality and the most accurate translation. You translated work cannot be a joke!

For more information visit us at www.lingperfect.com

Now Youtube with a translation tool too?

It seems like Twitter is not the only one creating a translation tool! Youtube has created a translation tool for captions.

Look at the pros and cons New Media Rocktar have given us. http://newmediarockstars.com/2013/07/get-a-more-global-audience-3-youtube-caption-language-translation-tools/

Pros: Volunteer captioning is available in over 300 languages from Italian to Inuktitut. Best part — it’s free!

Cons: No guarantees that translation will be the way you want and on time since it’s all done manually and on a volunteer basis.

Don't you think the cons really outweigh the pros?

Don't want to take risks? We are ISO certified and you can always trust us because we guarantee the best and most accurate translation! Visit us at www.lingperfect.com

How accurate can twitter translation tool be?

Hi all!

Did you know that we may soon have a translation tool for tweets? According to ABC News Twitter is testing a tweet translation tool!

How accurate do you think it will be? Won't it be like another Google Translate type of translation?

Check it out yourself and let us know what you think!

http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/technology/2013/07/twitter-testing-tweet-translation-tool/

With our ISO certification you know we will always provide the best quality and the most accurate translation! So go check us out at www.lingperfect.com!

Can anyone tell me what they are trying to say?

Polite Language and No noising? This is one of the most awkward translation I have read!

Please, not the same translation in a warning sign!

For more funny translations go to http://www.engrish.com/page/2/

These are they type of translations that LingPerfect would never make because we are ISO certified! High quality will always be guaranteed! 

Visit us at www.lingperfect.com and don't confuse anyone!

What are you thinking?

Here is a funny video that will make your day even though it is a Monday!

Next time you need help please don't look for this German coast guard! We are a much better option! Check us out at www.lingperfect.com

Who doesn't like laughing?

Here is joke for a happy Friday!

An American is on vacation in the Netherlands when, driving through the countryside, he spots a beautiful little farm. So he pulls up on the driveway to have a closer look. Unfortunately, he doesn't pay attention and crushes a couple of chickens in the process.
The farmer comes out of his house, fuming.
The American tries to tell him to "keep quiet".
To which the Dutch farmer replies: "Kiep kwait? Kiep kwait? K bun wel duzend kiepen kwait!"

(For those who are not familiar with Dutch dialects: The words "keep quiet" sound almost the same as the Dutch rural dialect "kiep kwait", which means "chicken gone". ("Chicken gone? I've lost at least a dozen chicken!")

Don't want your real life to be a joke? We can definitely help you with that! Go visit us at www.lingperfect.com

10 Funny English-Spanish Translation Fails!

Have you translated anything from one language to another?

Look at these 10 Funny English-Spanish Translation Fails!

Want to know about these mistakes? Go to http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/02/27/10-funny-translations-spanish-english_n_2774588.html

Don't want to make these mistakes and damage the image of your business? We are here to help! Visit us at www.lingperfect.com

Same meaning different word/Different word same meaning

Spanish is really not universal!

Look at how something is called differently in the different Spanish speaking countries!
 

English Phrase	Translations by Country	Comments
Apricot	Most: albaricoque Argentina, Chile, Uruguay: damasco Mexico: chabacano	In Spain: saying that someone is "chabacano" means he is vulgar.
Baby	Most: bebé Argentina, Uruguay: beba (girl), bebe (boy) Chile: guagua	In Cuba, the Dominican Republic, Puerto Rico and the Canary Islands: a "guagua" is a bus.
Bug	Most: bicho Mexico: insecto	In Puerto Rico: "bicho" has a sexual meaning (it's a key part of the male anatomy). A bug killer was once translated as "mata bichos" and, as you can imagine, this sounded very funny in Puerto Rico.
Cake	Most: pastel Argentina, Chile, Ecuador, Uruguay, Venezuela: torta Bolivia, Costa Rica: queque Colombia: ponqué, torta Cuba: cake Dominican Republic, Puerto Rico: bizcocho Panama: cake, dulce Peru: queque, torta Spain: tarta	"Torta" in Mexico means "sandwich" (torta de jamón) “Torta” in the Dominican Republic is most of the time refer to the whip cream thrown into people’s faces in TV shows
Car trunk	Mexico: "cajuela", in other countries "maletero", "baúl"
Department Store	Mexico: "cajuela", in other countries "maletero", "baúl"	Most: grandes almacenes Cuba: tienda Colombia: almacén grande Costa Rica: tienda de departamentos Dominican Republic, El Salvador, Guatemala, Honduras, Puerto Rico, Venezuela: tienda por departamentos Mexico: tienda departamental Panama: Almacén
Elevator	Mexico: elevador, in most countries "ascensor"
Eyeglasses	Most: anteojos Colombia: gafas, lentes Cuba, Puerto Rico: espejuelos Dominican Republic, Ecuador, Panama, Peru, México, Venezuela: lentes Spain: gafas	"Anteojos" is an old fashioned word in Mexico. “Gafa” in Venezuela mean dumb girl
Grocery Store	Colombia: mercado Costa Rica: compras Cuba: bodega Dominican Republic: víveres El Salvador: pulpería Guatemala: tienda Mexico: super, tienda de abarrotes Panama: abarrotería Puerto Rico: colmado Spain, Venezuela: supermercado Uruguay: almacén
Hello? (answering telephone)	Most: ¿Dígame? Argentina, Bolivia: ¿Hola? Cuba: ¿Oigo? Colombia, Costa Rica, Dominican Republic, Ecuador, El Salvador, Guatemala, Honduras, Peru, Venezuela: ¿Aló? Mexico: ¿Bueno? Panama, Puerto Rico: ¿Haló? Uruguay: ¿Aló? ¿Hola?
Hot pepper	Most: chile Bolivia, Chile, Venezuela, Peru: ají Colombia, Cuba, Panama, Puerto Rico: ají picante Costa Rica: chile picante Ecuador: pimiento picante Spain: guindilla
Jacket	Most: chaqueta Argentina: campera Dominican Republic, Panama: saco Mexico: chamarra Peru: casca Puerto Rico: blazer (women), gabán (men)	In Spain, for example, a "saco" is a large bag, for example, a large bag of potatoes. In Mexico "saco" is used for suits.
Lawn	Most: césped Argentina, Bolivia, Mexico, Peru: pasto Colombia: hierba, manga, pasto, prado Cuba, Dominican Republic: yerba Dominican Republic, El Salvador, Guatemala, Honduras, Venezuela: grama Puerto Rico: grama, pasto	In Spain: "pasto" is grass for animals (for grazing) and "grama" is a type of grass for the lawn.
Muffin	Most: panecillo Argentina, Colombia: muffin Bolivia: pancito Guatemala: mollete Mexico: muffin, panqué, pastelito Peru: quequito Venezuela: ponqué	In some countries: "panecillo" is a dinner roll and "panqué" is a pancake.
Popcorn	Cuba: rositas de maíz Argentina: pochoclo Venezuela: cotufa Spain: palomitas, palomitas de maíz	“Palomitas” can also mean little pigeons
Sidewalk	Mexico: banqueta, acera In many countries: "acera"	In Spain: "banqueta" is a bench

This is one of the many reason you love us and not Google Translate!

Need us? Please visit us at www.lingperfect.com